Words of Wisdom

Photo nabbed from http://www.flickr.com/photos/bruce_mcadam/322383628/

Ask any single person what their absolute least favorite piece of unsolicited advice is and I'd bet money their answer would be, "Oh, you'll just know when it's the one". I'm sorry, but I need more specifics. I have met plenty of guys who, in my (neurotic) mind, very well could be it. I'm attracted to them, they sprinkle sweet anecdotes about their moms into conversations, and they make me laugh. Bam! You're now the one! But, apparently this is not how it works. The one thing those coupled-up advice givers do not tell you is that the guy also has to have that, "she's the one" feeling. To quote one of my girlfriends, "chemistry is a fickle bitch!" For example, last night I had a date with a very nice lad with thick dark hair, sexy latin accent, and a keen sense of style. During our date I found myself looking over his shoulder at the shaggy, bearded guy slumping over his PBR. And the funny thing is, my date was making me laugh, buying my drinks and genuinely interested in what I was saying. He very well could have been thinking I'm the one.

After dates like this I often feel exasperated and find myself tightening up my coat of cynicism even further. If I'm not pleased with good-looking gentlemen who shows genuine interest in me, who is going to make me happy? I often think all this online dating has desensitized me and made me even pickier than I was before. This makes me think of my second favorite piece of advice I've received- "You know, when I stopped looking I finally met him!" Thanks people, very helpful. One minute I'm being told "you'll never find him sitting at home" but when I repeatedly go out with different people and still can't find anyone of interest or the ones I'm interested in hurt my feelings, I'm told to stop looking?

I'm much too controlling to believe he's just going to fall into my lap (literally or figuratively). At least while I'm here in Portland. Since moving from the Midwest I think I've been approached by maybe two guys in the four years I've been here. Apparently the Pacific Northwest's laid back attitude also applies to dating. You've got to be proactive if you want to meet someone. Though I'm thinking I've got to start looking elsewhere...