Photo nabbed from http://www.innocentenglish.com/cute-animals/cute-baby-kittens-puppies-img/siamese-cat-online-img115.jpg
A post or two back I posed the question, "Does the fact that you met on a website take some of the fun and excitement out of it or ease some of your anxieties about meeting new people?"
You've heard my opinion on this topic. Now let's hear what one of my snarky girlfriends, Little Shooter, has to say on this topic:
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How does "I think I'm going to take my dog for a walk." turn into "I think I'm going to take my dog on a walk to the plaid pantry." turn into "I just drank an entire bottle of $6 wine."? (So I haven't torn my way through the whole bottle yet but it's a slippery slope.) How does that happen? To whom does that happen? Well, it happens to me - Little Shooter. Has happened. More than once. And do you know where a bottle of cheap wine leaves you? Watching a lifetime movie...
Not to say that I don't have some sort of option that I could have tapped into on a Saturday night. But I "chose" to stay in on account of the second head cold in six weeks that has called my head it's home. (PS I think the girl from My Girl (sad Culkin movie where boy with allergy to bees dies?) is co-starring in this crappy holiday lifetime movie. Some IMDB action will hopefully solve the mystery.)) I digress.
Topic of real life guy vs. internet guy... I turn to Ladybird's quote... "Does the fact that you met on a website take some of the fun and excitement out of it or ease some of your anxieties about meeting new people?"
Both. The answer is both. My mother (yes, I've turned to my mother for advice/counsel/pitty etc.) gave to me this example; "The job you find after months of grooming your resume and interviewing repeatedly is not as exciting as the same job offered to you when the man behind you in the coffee shop line offers you a position after he picks up your fallen business card. It's the spontaneity." Other side of the coin? Repeated "first dates" help to... dilute some of the excessive excitement (?) some girls may feel after having met "a great new guy" in the real world. (ie One upright male with a full set of teeth, a vocabulary, a penchant for eye contact, and possibly a checking account. (Important not because we are gold diggers but because that's a clue to grown-up responsibility.)) Repeated first dates allows us to get accustomed to the anxiety/excitement. After the first few not-so-great attempts we decide that we have nothing to lose and we make it practice. Practice for what we consider "the real life encounter."
The bonus for online guy? He sees the fab girl we act like when we are in the full-length mirror. But it sucks to be 'online-guy'... Our experiences become diluted. Our encounter with said online dude means less 'cause we have a whole inbox of dudes that would also like to meet us for coffee/beer this week.
We are not cocky. Honestly. We're not. But there's a string of dudes out there (however short) that think our "about me" is clever and our profile pic is adorbs... We appreciate their ballsiness in messaging us, and we want them to continue to do so. But please, let them be patient with us. Let them be patient with the system. "Real life" dudes may be spur-of-the-moment but they are just as likely to be douches as the next guy. It's all about timing and lighting.
(PS the My Girl girl is totally the co-star...)
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Little Shooter and I have had countless conversations to this effect. She is actually the gal who inspired me to start online dating again. Not because she was having such a magnificent time per se, but rather, because she seemed as though she was doing something proactive where as I was doing a lot of whining and moping about. Thank you for your opinions Little Shooter! And to anyone else who has had the fantastic luck of finding this blog, let me know your thoughts too!
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